In the marriage ceremony, we say vows, promises of how we will relate to each other.  Many couples who came to my pastor husband for counseling before the marriage ceremony desired to verbally make a vow to God and to each other in this holy act of matrimony.  He would show them various forms of vows with this purpose of honoring God and each other. 

Randy wanted each man and woman to realize what they were promising to each other and to God!  In counseling, he showed them that vows are not to be broken so they must not enter this union lightly.  Most couples knew this, seeking God’s blessings on their marriage.  But a few came for convenience only.  They merely wanted a pastor to say the words and send them on their merry way with the attitude of “if it doesn’t work out, no worries, we’ll just move on.”  These words were actually said by one of the couples in counseling.  It is this attitude that would cause Randy much sadness for he could not ask God’s blessing upon a couple for convenience only, thinking the vows were without meaning.  Vows are important to God because we are important to God.

Let us revisit typical vows made to each other:

• “I, _____, take you _____, to be my (wedded) wife/husband. To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, as long as we both shall live.
• I, _____, take you _____, to be my wife/husband; and I promise, before God and these witnesses, to be your loving and faithful husband/wife; in plenty and in want; in joy and in sorrow; in sickness and in health; as long as we both shall live.
• I, _____, take you, _____, to be my wife/husband from this time onward, to join with you and to share all that is to come, to give and to receive, to speak and to listen, to inspire and to respond, and in all of our life together to be loyal to you with my whole life and with all my being.

As you can see a vow seals the relationship with each other and binds us as one with God.  When we choose God to be the head of our household, listen to His leading, trust that His way is best, our love for each other solidify and will last a lifetime as our relationship with God and each other grows sweeter each day.  When we vow to follow His direction and leading; our marriage vow will be kept throughout life no matter what circumstances challenge us.  God’s love in us goes deeper still when our faith in all circumstances is built on the foundation and source of our salvation—Jesus Christ as Lord.

How do I know?  We took a vow over 53 years ago to love God and each other as long as we both shall live. We continue keeping the vow with God and each other!  Through good times and challenging times; Keeping the vow is worth all the effort we put into it, God helping us! 

Numbers 30

Vows

Moses said to the heads of the tribes of Israel: “This is what the Lord commands: ² When a man makes a vow to the Lord or takes an oath to obligate himself by a pledge, he must not break his word but must do everything he said.

³ “When a young woman still living in her father’s household makes a vow to the Lord or obligates herself by a pledge ⁴ and her father hears about her vow or pledge but says nothing to her, then all her vows and every pledge by which she obligated herself will stand. ⁵ But if her father forbids her when he hears about it, none of her vows or the pledges by which she obligated herself will stand; the Lord will release her because her father has forbidden her.

⁶ “If she marries after she makes a vow or after her lips utter a rash promise by which she obligates herself ⁷ and her husband hears about it but says nothing to her, then her vows or the pledges by which she obligated herself will stand. ⁸ But if her husband forbids her when he hears about it, he nullifies the vow that obligates her or the rash promise by which she obligates herself, and the Lord will release her.

⁹ “Any vow or obligation taken by a widow or divorced woman will be binding on her.

¹⁰ “If a woman living with her husband makes a vow or obligates herself by a pledge under oath ¹¹ and her husband hears about it but says nothing to her and does not forbid her, then all her vows or the pledges by which she obligated herself will stand. ¹² But if her husband nullifies them when he hears about them, then none of the vows or pledges that came from her lips will stand. Her husband has nullified them, and the Lord will release her. ¹³ Her husband may confirm or nullify any vow she makes or any sworn pledge to deny herself. ¹⁴ But if her husband says nothing to her about it from day to day, then he confirms all her vows or the pledges binding on her. He confirms them by saying nothing to her when he hears about them. ¹⁵ If, however, he nullifies them some time after he hears about them, then he must bear the consequences of her wrongdoing.”

¹⁶ These are the regulations the Lord gave Moses concerning relationships between a man and his wife, and between a father and his young daughter still living at home.

WHAT DO WE KNOW—HOW DO WE RESPOND?

We read in Leviticus 27 how Moses had touched on the subject of vows in terms of dedicating people and possessions to the Lord; but here he deals with personal vows and how they are affected by relationships. The chapter makes it clear that the home is basic to the nation, that there must be authority of God in the home, and that truth is what binds society together.  Being truthful builds a trusting relationship. Broken vows and hasty promises made without thinking do not build a home of trust and assurance.

There is a difference between “vows” and “oaths.” Both were to be considered binding. The vow was a promise to do a certain thing for the Lord, while the oath was a promise not to do a certain thing. People who made vows or took oaths had to keep their word, because what they said was to the Lord. When people forget that God hears what they say, then they’re tempted to deceive and manipulate. Lies cause the fabric of society to rip apart as trust is violated. Betrayal does not build trust in any relationship.

To make a promise is to obligate oneself to the Lord, whether people realize this or not. The foundations of society today are eroding because of unkept promises, whether they be official contracts, marriage vows, political pledges, or words spoken on the witness stand. We expect the Lord to keep His promises, and He expects us to keep ours. Truth is the cement that holds society together.  Truth is the way to eternal life!  Jesus is the Way! 

Relationships bring responsibilities, so to rush into unwise commitments is to incur penalties and consequences that are costly.

“Don’t trap yourself by making a rash promise to God and only later counting the cost.” Proverbs 20:25

Lord,

Thank you for Your Word and the lessons you teach us for living life here in preparation for there with you for eternity.  Thank you for making the vow to forgive us, removing our sins forever. Thank you for your vow to never leave us but to always be with us.  Thank you for your faithfulness to us even when we were less than faithful to you. Thank you for loving us relentlessly and unconditionally.  Thank you for Life!  Thank you for help in troubles and peace in the storms that secure our trust in you.  Thank for being our strong foundation to stand on always. I trust you, dear Jesus.  I love you with all my heart, mind, and soul.  I’m yours and I’m listening.

In Jesus Name, Amen