Here are a few blunders that I picked up along the way that you might enjoy:

“Finished eighth in my class of ten.”
“Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year.”
“Reason for leaving last job: maturity leave.”
“Failed bar exam with relatively high grades.”
“Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.”
“It’s best for employers that I not work with people.”
“Let’s meet, so you can ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’ over my experience.”
“I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse.”
“You will want me to be Head Honcho in no time.”
“I have become completely paranoid, trusting completely no one and absolutely nothing.”
“Personal interests: donating blood. Fourteen gallons so far.”
“Marital status: often. Children: various.”
“I am loyal to my employer at all costs..Please feel free to respond to my resume on my office voice mail.”
“Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain store.”

What to read something even more weird? Jesus is asked for HIS resume! Wow, how bold and ridiculous the Pharisaical church committee was to ask for the resume of Jesus Christ the Son of God! But they did! He loved people, they loved Him! Fear over loss of control and power over people led them to ask for the Son of God’s credentials. Jesus responds by simply taking them back to the Scriptures as a point of reference for the group who thought they knew everything. By the way, when we think we know everything, we are living very dangerously close to knowing nothing and our life shows it.

Matthew 12, Msg:

Later a few religion scholars and Pharisees got on him. “Teacher, we want to see your credentials. Give us some hard evidence that God is in this. How about a miracle?”

39-40 Jesus said, “You’re looking for proof, but you’re looking for the wrong kind. All you want is something to titillate your curiosity, satisfy your lust for miracles. The only proof you’re going to get is what looks like the absence of proof: Jonah-evidence. Like Jonah, three days and nights in the fish’s belly, the Son of Man will be gone three days and nights in a deep grave.

41-42 “On Judgment Day, the Ninevites will stand up and give evidence that will condemn this generation, because when Jonah preached to them they changed their lives. A far greater preacher than Jonah is here, and you squabble about ‘proofs.’ On Judgment Day, the Queen of Sheba will come forward and bring evidence that will condemn this generation, because she traveled from a far corner of the earth to listen to wise Solomon. Wisdom far greater than Solomon’s is right in front of you, and you quibble over ‘evidence.’

43-45 “When a defiling evil spirit is expelled from someone, it drifts along through the desert looking for an oasis, some unsuspecting soul it can bedevil. When it doesn’t find anyone, it says, ‘I’ll go back to my old haunt.’ On return it finds the person spotlessly clean, but vacant. It then runs out and rounds up seven other spirits more evil than itself and they all move in, whooping it up. That person ends up far worse off than if he’d never gotten cleaned up in the first place.

“That’s what this generation is like: You may think you have cleaned out the junk from your lives and gotten ready for God, but you weren’t hospitable to my kingdom message, and now all the devils are moving back in.” –Jesus

So, those who in the church didn’t accept or believe and those outside the church clamored to the feet of the Savior, humbling bowing before him. Even the demons knew who He was.

Dear Heavenly Father, May we never be so full of ourselves that we ask You for proof of Who You are! We do not need proof of Your love and Your Holy Presence in our lives! We do not need evidence of Your salvation to us. Our eyes have not seen, but we still believe. We are redeemed! There is too much evidence already around us, living in us and through us to be foolish enough not to trust and believe in You. To You be all the glory, honor and praise! We are grateful. We believe. Keep us alert, cleansed and holy before You as we continue to travel this journey with You. Show us Your ways. Your servant is listening. In Jesus Name, Amen