“For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.”—Jesus, Matthew 18:20

The verse above was quoted more often than I can count in my growing up years as a “lifer” in the church—but out of context, most times. It was said often by our discouraged pastor or song leader who looked over the “faithful few” who would gather Sunday night or on Wednesday Bible Study. We called them the committed and devoted.  The larger group of somewhat committed attenders came on Sunday morning to Sunday School and church. “Fringe People” skipped Sunday School and only came for church. With later generations, we saw the fringe skippers only come Christmas and Easter.  But still we would hear, “where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them” as an encouragement to those who came.

When we go to Matthew 18 to read the whole chapter and verse of Jesus’ teachings, we learn more.  He is talking to the religious leaders as well as His devoted disciples who are following and listening to Him. These are examples of how Jesus addresses these topics with instructions:

1. At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who, then, is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?”  (My response would be, “are you serious right now James and John?”)  But Jesus said, “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.”  He is calling His church of followers to be childlike in faith; but not childish in relationships.

• “Woe to those who cause anyone to trip and stumble in their faith.” In Jesus time on earth, He noticed all the debating, criticizing, and heated arguments over The Law of God.  Jesus, who is The Way to Truth with the Gift of Eternal life from God, explained; “If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. Woe to the world because of the things that cause people to stumble!”—Jesus. We cannot be the ones who quarrel over religion without having a loving, growing relationship with Jesus who commands us to love God and love each other.  We cause others to wonder then stumble over why we argue in the church over things of this world that do not bring us closer to God and each other.  I was asked once, by a new believer, “are you guys in a competition, or what?”  Mm, ouch.

• “What do you think? If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the hills and go to look for the one that wandered off? –Jesus.  I can’t count how many times an elder in the church would answer this question with, “they know we are here, they’ll come when they want.”  (No, most likely they won’t because they might not be sure if you care, but okay.)  Jesus adds, “And if he finds it, truly I tell you, he is happier about that one sheep than about the ninety-nine that did not wander off. In the same way your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should perish.”

• Jesus didn’t stop there; He also dealt with sin inside the church in this way. “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector. Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.”—Jesus

All that Jesus taught came from the love of God in Him with the Spirit of God guiding Him as Truth.  We approach church discipline as it is called, with much prayer, asking for God’s wisdom, with the attitude of Jesus, with a desire to be like Him who put His own interests aside. (Philippians 2)  Paul emphasizes how to be childlike in faith versus childish in behavior with;

“Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.” Ephesians 4:15

Notice that we are to keep the matter private. Approach the person who sinned and speak with him or her alone. It is possible that the person does not even realize what he or she has done. Or, even if the act was deliberate, our own attitude of submission and love will help the person repent and apologize. Above all else, we should approach the person with the idea of winning our brother or sister, not winning an argument. We don’t want to win the argument and lose the person.

• “Where two or three are gathered” means more than we thought— It’s not about the numbers of people gathered but about the way we relate to each other no matter the number of those present!  It’s about the discipline of being like Christ who is the Head of the Church. 

The local church, however, should be at its best spiritually before seeking to discipline a member. When disciplining a member, a church is actually examining and disciplining itself as the Body of Christ! This is why our Lord added these words about authority, prayer, and fellowship. We cannot discipline others if we ourselves are not disciplined. Whatever we permit in the church must first have been permitted by God.  Arguing with hateful words and demeaning of each other’s character to get our own way on any matter is not of God or permitted by God. 

Jesus brought us the gospel of peace to a world in need of a Savior.  Jesus taught us how to live in peace as well as how to seek God first in all of life, then speak His Words by His Spirit living in us—just as He did as our perfect example.  (Read the gospels plus Philippians 2) Jesus argued to win the religious leaders over to be back in relationship with their God.  Some did come over to His way of Kingdom thinking, most did not.  But the bottom line is this—Jesus did and said what God, His Father told Him. We are to do likewise.

Hang in there, I am going back to bring us forward.  The above explanation in the first paragraph describes what it was like for me growing up in church of about 100 people on any given Sunday in the “Bible Belt” region of the country.  There were many smaller churches that dotted the landscape with only one or two “mega” churches in our region. 

Our church people on the inside were “family friendly and welcoming” to all who came. My grandma who never read a “First Impressions” book or went to workshop on welcoming first-time visitors, naturally and lovingly did all “the things”—even asking first time or returning visitors if they had plans for lunch. If they consented, and grandma was very persuasive, she would bring them home to their farm table filled with fried chicken, homemade hot rolls, and all the sides she had made early that morning before arriving at church!  Grandpa and Grandma hosted not only their immediate family of two daughters, their spouses, with 5 kids between them every Sunday for lunch; but also brought in strangers who were welcomed as “family”.  THIS was our lifestyle.  This is what I grew up knowing. Her daughters, me, my daughters and now my granddaughters became generations of hosts with home-cooking or at least take out!

I have written Daily Manna for quite a few years now and I have most times been led to share the good times of growing up in my home church as it relates the God’s Word today.  But, I feel led to talk about what many do not—the darker sides of smaller churches. However, I have discovered so of the same unhealth that hinders the health of new believers in much larger churches that have worked as a leader. “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” …Romans 3:23

I preface some of these memories with caution to the reader with a Spirit of Love.  I loved my upbringing because I loved God from early childhood. That love for God came from parents and grandparents, uncles, aunts, cousins and other mentors who loved God with all their hearts, minds, and souls. I loved going to church from nursery through young adulthood to marriage, and having my own family.  I still love meeting others who love God and submit to Christ as the Head of the church!  So, as the David begins, “let us go the house of God,” my heart agrees wholeheartedly and I also leap for joy! 

Jerusalem was built for worship of the One and Only True God.  It was designed for all nations to come His house of prayer and worship.  “This”, writes David is what it means to be Israel—God’s People. THIS was David’s lifestyle.

Centuries later, Jesus will passionately preach how to be the church of brothers and sisters who love and relate to each other in peace—Jesus’ peace—the peace that the world cannot give, the peace that “passes all understanding” for it brings calm assurance when troubles come, accusations fly, and there seems to be no resolution.  Only the Prince of Peace, who is not of this world, can give the peace we need. The beauty of the peace of Jesus is that His peace lives in all who surrender to Him as Lord of their lives.  Is His Peace our lifestyle?

Let’s read this psalm prayerfully…

Psalm 122, The Message

A song of ascents. Of David.

^1-2 When they said, “Let’s go to the house of God,”
    my heart leaped for joy.
And now we’re here, O Jerusalem,
    inside Jerusalem’s walls!

^3-5 Jerusalem, well-built city,
    built as a place for worship!
The city to which the tribes ascend,
    all God’s tribes go up to worship,
To give thanks to the name of God—
    this is what it means to be Israel.
Thrones for righteous judgment
    are set there, famous David-thrones.

^6-9 Pray for Jerusalem’s peace!
    Prosperity to all you Jerusalem-lovers!
Friendly insiders, get along!
    Hostile outsiders, keep your distance!
For the sake of my family and friends,
    I say it again: live in peace!
For the sake of the house of our God, God,
    I’ll do my very best for you.

WHAT DO WE LEARN—HOW DO WE RESPOND?

Verses 6-9 is a passionate plea for peace from David to all who would listen!  “Pray for Jerusalem!”  We’re still praying for Jerusalem!  We ask “why can’t they get along” without looking inside ourselves when we disagree in churches across our country, causing endless skirmishes that have been going on as long as I have lived—and not lovingly disagreeing but some moments escalate into hateful wars over…choosing carpet color, eating in a fellowship building attached to the sanctuary or not, parking lot use between services times, the singing of hymns verses “camp choruses”, not to mention “rock music of gospel with guitars, drums or no drums came later.  In 2020, I was ashamed of many of us of the church who argued about the government mandate during the Covid crisis. Whoa, church, are you hearing what you are saying so empathically and hatefully?  I prayed for peace.  I was a church leader at the time and heard it all.  Oh Lord, we were tested and failed, didn’t we?

During my lifetime, it was mostly the small things in doing church that caused church people (the faithful few) to go to war. It really hurt to see the warring use Scripture as their weapons to fight for their point of view.  What hurts the most though, are the casualties of war all because we lost our identity in Christ and therefore failed at being the church to those in need of a Savior.

Those Sunday dinners, I talked about earlier sometimes ended in packing up early on Sunday afternoons when raised voices of disagreements over church stuff became ugly.  Fortunately, it was after the “visitors” left.  But, coming in from play with my cousins, I readily saw the disheartened look on my grandparents faces with tears in their eyes, and I vowed not to be this way. What does God think? I wondered. I prayed for peace in my young heart.  I still pray for peace.  God answers prayers of peace and most times the ones most disagreeable settled to love instead—until the next argument.  But the scars remained as a reminder to me to seek peace in Jesus.  He knows and He cares. Later in life, as a wife, mother, teacher, church leader, pastor’s wife, youth leader, and janitor of the church; I learned that there is no disagreement or “right” that is worth losing the peace of Christ in my heart. 

Pray for peace—Live with the Peace of Christ within!  Our King of kings and Lord of lords is the Prince of Peace. There will be THAT DAY when all will bow and worship Jesus in peace.  On that day, all nations will be at peace from the Enemy as he will be deleted forever from God’s Plan of Salvation for all who believe and endure in faith. God will prevail. He always has and always will. Trust Him.

Lord,

This was a hard place in my memories to revisit but once more healing in your way. Cleanse our hearts, renew our minds, refresh our souls, restore the joy of your salvation at work within us and give us your peace in our hearts. I love you with all my heart, mind, and soul. I love your church filled with people who believe and want to tell others of you.  Help us all to love like you love us.

In Jesus Name, Amen